this could be life changing?

somehow, i don't think it will be.
I look back over the past few years, i always think about them. I think about all the decisions i've made, the romances embarked on, the mistakes that were my downfalls, the nights that i hope will stay with me forever, the friends i've found, the friends i've lost, the people that have inspired me, the tears cried and the emotions felt.


I think alot of who i am today, comes down to one decision i made on May 27th 2007.


Yes, i am completely and utterly aware that to still know this day is slightly crazy if not a little bit sad. That simple decision, i can still remember it as clear as day. Sitting on a bench in town, with two of my closest friends, the persuasion of my mother, the tickets hurriedly paid for, the outfit changes, the butterflies; i was going somewhere new. I met someone here, someone i know i will never forget. I know i talk about it all the time. But it literally scares me to think where i'd be if i hadn't made this decision. Maybe our paths would've crossed anyway? Who knows. However i do know, that meeting this person changed me in so many ways, i'm not totally sure how he did it. I think i was just ready to change, to be something new.


If i hadn't met this person, then i wouldn't have a whole group of friends, i wouldn't know the people that i have shared so many of the nights i don't want to ever forget. I wouldn't know one of my bestfriends? I wouldn't have learnt, i wouldn't be so brilliantly aware as i'd like to think i am now. I wouldn't have half the confidence i have now, i wouldn't actually believe that i am worth something. If i hadn't of thought all those things about myself, then maybe i wouldn't have the other friends i hold so dear.

It made me realise how it's not the 'life changing' decisions that will actually change your life, it's the simple ones that you're not even aware that you're making that will count. I owe you so much. You know i do, because i've told you, and you smiled, gave me a hug and said 'you're welcome'.


It also made me see that i have so much to look forward to, because what seems to important now, will one day be so amazingly irrelevant. It's a weird thought, but will i even know half of the people i spend my weekends with ten years from now? I hope so. Though i also hope someone else has whisked me up and changed me all over again. Maybe it'll happen tomorrow, maybe in a year. Who knows. No one can ever know, that's what makes life so exciting.